You know that feeling? That heaviness? The toll of the bell.
Something is attached to you. Chained to you. You cannot see it but every time you move, it rings. No-one else cares. You shake your head, walk backwards, run to hide but nothing gets rid of the tight feeling in your throat and the jingling in your head. You cannot do anything you want because there is no peace. You cannot think straight.
The hardest thing is to sit still. You just want it gone. You run and run but it comes with you. Even when you go to bed, the bell tinkles and you twitch and turn. Nightmares surround you.
When you tell your friends, they cannot feel the noise. They tell you to calm down. Give you a drink of milk, or water. They try to tempt you with food. Maybe your favourite fish platter? You chew a tiny bit then slowly move away. Everything seems okay, but then the jangling happens. It will not stop. You cry. Life is full of fear. Doom looms in every corner of the house.
Here is a solution:
- 1. Find a person you trust. Share the nightmare, bit by bit. This person does not blame you for the noise. She listens and reflects back your stories about the bell from a different perspective. She helps you celebrate your true self and prepare to let go of the chain of fear.
- 2. Together you learn that this bell is one that was stuck to you in a previous situation. The chain slipped around your neck unknowingly. You were so busy staying alive that you did not have time or energy to notice the constant clanging.
- 3. Gradually, you and the trusted person work out how to loosen the links, unfasten the clip and take off the bell. Gently, you work together to break the bell’s spell. You look at it. It is very small and insignifant when you see it clearly. You walk outside and leave it in a place where it cannot ring any more.
- 4. Finally, you wrap yourself in a soft blanket and fall asleep peacefully. When you wake up, you are stronger, wiser, safer and ready to build your life of freedom and happiness.
Months later, after a harmonious day of butterflies, sunshine and fun, you stretch and try to remember what the bell sounded like. The memory is hazy but you know how much you have gained by breaking through the fears and letting go of them. Life is sweet.
This is a true story of the recovery of an exceptional feline client I had the privilege of mentoring, following her rescue from traumatic captivity.